It really never gets tiresome beating on East Carolina, for various reasons. Here’s one of them: they got punked by Cracker Barrel. Yes, as in the restaurant that serves country fried steak and has the triangle peg games located at all its tables. Via Nathan Fowler at FanHouse, comes the delightful information that an ECU fan emailed a Barrel rep about their lack of purple and gold/yellow available within the Greenville, NC (where ECU is located) store. Here’s the response they got:
[...] since this is a small school that plays in a small conference there are few manufacturers that will make ECU merchandise [...]
Ouch, babe. Or, alternately: aaaaaaaaargh. Of course, those classy purple colored bags went to war.
Pirate fans went all email mutiny-like on the chain’s suggestion box, complaining viciously that they had been wronged and Cracker Barrel backpeddled faster than a group of girls walking into a pterodactyl/salamander filled late night.
[...]I also am very sorry for the response sent by one of our Guest Relations Representatives. The response was not an informed nor researched response. I apologize the response seemed insensitive to your concerns for the lack of ECU merchandise offered by Cracker Barrel Old Country Store. Please be assured this error has been addressed and corrections have been made within our department.[...][...] We do have a limited number of items available in East Carolina University in our Greenville, NC location only. We have sweaters, t-shirts, hats, children’s cheerleader and football outfits, coasters, garden flags, a hand-painted Christmas ornament, quilt, hand-painted lamp, and a coffee mug. If while you are visiting our Greenville store you don’t find this merchandise, please ask one of our retail sales associates to assist you in locating these items. [...]
See, that’s where they’ve already screwed up. No eye-patches? Penicillin? Not even a home pregnancy test or forty? Cracker Barrel might want to rethink their marketing strategy. Maybe bring in a Greenville grad or two. After all, when you have a pile of genius capable of coming up with a purple pirate named Petey as a mascot, how can you lose?
{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }
Mr. Wuf? That must have taken some serious consideration and planning or it could be that all of the graduates of a course called “Bees and Beekeeping” came up with the idea while milking cows and shoveling manure while banging their sisters.
However, I am glad to know that the Salamander a la Pollock is still alive on the internet. That shit brightened up my day. He looks so happy sliding down those stairs. F*ck Cracker Barrel anyway…
1. The only reason NC State is as large as they are is because NC State girls only sleep/marry/sodomize NC State guys thus turning their children into…NC State students creating waaaay too many overrated fans.
2. ECU girls like sex, why you find a way to argue that or punish a school for this reason is beyond me. What a wonderful problem to have.
The problem with ecu girls liking sex is that they also like herpes, and the spread thereof.
Lets compare. ECU 60/40 girl guy ratio, gorgeous women, mediocre football, people drink at tailgates to NC State 20/80 girl guy ratio, mediocre women, mediocre (at best) football, people die at tailgates. Our choice is clear.
Plus Cracker Barrel may be the single worst rip off of real country food ever.
Gorgeous? That’s hilarious. As of 2006 NC State’s ratio was 55/45 girl to guy, http://www2.acs.ncsu.edu/UPA/enrollmentdata/f06enrol/index.htm. It’s fitting that you used incorrect facts to arrive at your conclusion, I wouldn’t expect anything less from an ECU graduate. We have killer tailgates, so what? Greenville is a stain on North Carolina. Come to think of it, any area ending in “ville” should just be wiped off the map. I’ll be going out to Raleigh bars with girls who can actually comprehend multisyllabic words while you guys hang out at your shitty apartment trying to figure out how to make moonshine. You guys better finish up by 10:00pm, I think that’s when “The Dukes of Hazard” reruns air, and I know you can’t afford or figure out how to use a DVR.
Correction, 55/45 guy to girl. You’re still retarded.
Re: Girl/Guy ratio
Don’t forget we supplement with St. Mary’s High School right down the street…