A friend of Brahsome recalled a story a while back from his days in high school. This fellow shared his homeroom with a class clown of sorts who had a way of saying funny shit more often than not. One such time was the day student directories were passed out. Upon having one laid upon his desk, this gentleman turned to the friend of Brahsome and, with a sly grin, said “let the stalking begin.” Well, that joke is reality now with some guy paying $5,300 for a tissue used by Scarlett Johansson. That’s some serious coin for some snot and lipstick soaked piece of TP. And if this guys pockets are that deep, we’d be happy to auction off some tissues used when we were yerking to the picture above.
In related news, you gotta respect the guy who paid $30 large for a 20 minute date with ScarJo. If he can take 20 minutes with her, he’s a better man than any of us. Her presence makes real life mimic art in the form of Andy Samberg’s masterpiece Jizz In My Pants. “The next day my alarm goes off and I JIZZ IN MY PANTS. Open my window and a breeze rolls in and I JIZZ IN MY PANTS. When Bruce Willis was dead at the end of sixth sense I JIZZED IN MY PANTS. I just ate a grape and I JIZZED…IN…MY PANTS.”
