Morning Wood: The Weekend of Dante

I know what you’re thinking. Yes. It’s finally here. The Thursday Morning Wood. Our IT guys tell us that our traffic increases about by 250,000 hits every Thursday morning in anticipation of my Morning Wood posts.*

I’m going use my time this week to give a tip of the ol’ cap to my boy Dante.

I went to his wedding last weekend in Austin and it marked the fifth wedding of a good friend that I’ve attended in recent years. And with each wedding come more and more old friends from the past who show up with rings on their fingers and/or babies on their hips.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not complaining at all. It’s great to have a reason to fly back to Texas every few months to spend a weekend with my boys boozing and reminiscing. This time we did the bachelor party on Thursday, the rehearsal dinner on Friday, and the wedding on Saturday. It was basically three straight days of cocktails, shaking hands and kissing babies.

Thursday had the standard debauchery…a no holds barred party bus, a trip to ‘the club,’ and cold beers until the sun started to peak over the trees. This portion will be short on details.

Rehearsal dinner on Friday was a little more tame, but still a great time. We traded in boobies and dollar bills for suits, girlfriends and a choice salmon filet. I also made the first speech of my career.

The wedding on Saturday was awesome. I’ve been friends with the groom since we were about 11 and the bride since highschool. They kept the ceremony short, which is always appreciated by the people in the wedding party who have to stand in front of the whole crowd, sweating through the rented tuxedo under the bright lights of jebus for the whole damn thing. The best part was that they rewarded our efforts with two completely stocked, open bars at the reception. With a guest list of over 250, this is no small feat, I’m sure. So cheers to Becca’s dad for writing that check, it was appreciated by all. Seeing my parents and my friends all dressed to the nines, laughing and dancing, made it a great evening.

Watching the groom’s 17 year-old (male) cousin open a set and successfully hit on a 17 year-old (female) relative of the bride was pretty funny to see. Judging by her moves on the dance floor, there may or may not have been more in that glass than just cranberry juice. I doubt he has any pictures to prove the story he’s been telling in the lunch room all week, but picking up a random hottie at your cousin’s wedding is surely an ego boost that will last this kid for months if not years. Who cares if they don’t believe you at school? 250 of your cousin’s closest friends and relatives were there to see it and we were all impressed.

Basically, the whole weekend was badass.

Yes, you just read a reveiw of a wedding you didn’t attend for two people you don’t know…but this guy is one of my best friends and I told him I’d give him some brahsome love. So deal.

The Breakdown
Bachelor Party: 4.75/5 (I was late arriving due to travel)
Rehearsal Dinner: 5/5 (My speech was incredible and should be imitated by all)
Wedding: 5/5 (Beers in the church dressing room before the service was awesome. Especially when the pastor came in.)
Reception: 5/5 (Full, open bar. Beautiful ladies. Family/Friends partying together is always fun)

Congratulations to Mr. & Mrs. Dante Brown.

* Might not be accurate

Tagged as: Weddings