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A King Among Men

by Stamos on September 29, 2008

http://detroit.craigslist.org/rnr/854952148.html

To the Guy I met at the bar last night (west)

I was the tall blonde with the nice rack, tight jeans and oh so tan body. You bought me drinks all night long. After the bar closed, we went back to my place for more drinks. After many many drinks we headed back to my bedroom where we started kissing and fondling each other. I even allowed you to get into my panties. I explained to you that I wasn’t willing to go ” all the way” after just meeting you. Your exact words were ” thats ok, we can just lay here and cuddle” i thought that was some of the sweetest words I had ever heard. Little did I know about the ASSHOLE inside you.


I woke up to the birds chirping but couldn’t open my right eye, and you were gone. I went and looked in the mirror and saw DRIED EJACULATE on my face and in my eyelashes. I also found it on my breadspread and headboard. You disgusting pig, no it dosent end there. I went to thebathroom to wash your filth off and found that not only had you jacked off in my face while I was asleep, but you also took a SHIT on my bathroom floor.

What kind of peice of shit jacks off on someone when they are sleeping and then shits on the floor. I finally got your mess cleaned up and took a long hot shower, and went into my kitchen to make some coffee. There I find you took the entire 12 pack I bought last night along with a fifth of Patron….So lets recap what happened.

I fell asleep thinking this guy was so sweet and was going to have sex with him in the morning, to waking up with dried cum on my face, in my hair, eyes, on my headboard, etc.. and walking into my bathroom to find a turd coiled up on the floor like a snake ready to attack, and to top it all off, you took all the beer and a fifth of $55.00 patron out of my fridge….

FUCK YOU ASSHOLE!!!!!

* Location: west
* it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

PostingID: 854952148

{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }

Tom September 29, 2008 at 4:36 pm

oh man..that is great

Jon Donkey September 29, 2008 at 5:37 pm

That might be the greatest story I have heard in a while. Nothing is better than getting your nut off, then taking a shit afterwards, then heading to your own house to drink her booze. Thanks guys, keep up the good work!

WW September 29, 2008 at 6:38 pm

This has to be Scuba Steve Bulmberg!

WW September 29, 2008 at 6:40 pm

This makes him a repeat offender!!

WW September 29, 2008 at 6:40 pm

Blumberg..my bad

Green&Gray September 30, 2008 at 9:25 am

Nut on the face and ducein’ on the floor was awsome but getting a five finger discount on her beer makes that one of the greatest stories I have ever heard….thanks Stamos

The Sorostitute September 30, 2008 at 12:54 pm

That’s just a regular Wednesday night in the life of the Sorostitute.

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