There aren’t many options for a married man when it comes to telling his wife “Your food sucks”. Generally speaking, you just shut up and eat whatever she makes and grumble occasionally. (I presume, right?)
But not Chris Ford of Indiantown, Florida. No sir. He just gets all Southern-like on his lady sings her a sweet cherubic hymn: “Soooooooooooooooooong, Song of the South, Sweet Potato Pie and SHUT THE F*CK UP, B*TCH!!!”
When [Ford] got home he asked for something to eat, according to the report.But Ford was upset with the meal his girlfriend fixed for him and they got into an argument in the kitchen. While arguing, Ford picked up the sweet potato pie his girlfriend had recently removed from the oven and slammed it into her face, according to the report.
Ford ran outside the rear door of the residence when the woman’s three teenagers went into the kitchen to see what the ruckus was and saw their mom with pie on her face, according to the report.
Also, according to the report, Chris didn’t get any sex that night. At least not in the vaginal sense, depending on his bail posting ability. (And, I’m sorry for being a totally juvenile prick, but if you can read the line about pie –> slam –> face without laughing, you’re more mature than me. Which isn’t really saying much.)
Let’s just hope for his lady’s sake there was marshmallow topping involved.
