Today will be fantastic — Tiger against Rocco! (Corky!). That’s for sure. But did yesterday backdoor one of the better sporting days of the year? There are obviously days with more on, and with things more spread out, but that was pretty intense.

First of all, just a superb four days of the U.S. Open. I don’t know if it’s the fact that golf starts at 5pm Eastern that makes it so much better, but it certainly doesn’t hurt. Getting to watch Tiger get loose on eagles until 10 pm is just fun.

And now today, we get free golf. Rocco v. Tiger. It screams anticlimactic like nothing else before. Tiger shouldpunish him. And everyone knows that; if you want to try and place a wager on Tiger, you’re doing so at -400. (Bet 400 to win 100).

Rocco is, of course, +275. Which isn’t even really a great price, comparatively. Personally, I would take Tiger. (DUH.)

And then the Lakers game. It may be too soon to call for a Game 7, but all of a sudden, this series could quickly get out of hand, no? One absolute monster evening from Mamba and suddenly we’re staring down a climactic final game of the NBA season.

Anyway, I also feel the need to point out that yesterday was so stacked with fun (it wasn’t “outrageous” until the end) golf and good basketball, that I didn’t watch a single pitch of the Braves Sunday game, nor did I check fantasy more than five times.

Oh yes, and I played golf before any of the sports actually started. God bless the West Coast.

P.S. There will be live blog action at FanHouse for the US Open final round today.

It is Sunday. We are napping to golf and some baseball, waiting for the Finals, when Fancypants hollers to say that he is busy with housework and needs us to let the viewing public know that his next-in-line, white-hot pick for the Finals is San Antonio -7. We like to “think” (read: hope) LeBron is good enough to take over tonight and win the game himself or that Mike Brown can get involved in a nonharmful kidnapping plot. But when reality rears it’s ugly head, as it does often during the painful sunlight that is Sunday afternoon, we realize that the Spurs are just flat out better.

If you didn’t get Fancypants’ Alaskan Piper on the Spurs last night, well, it’s our fault–he had it in with plenty of time to spare but we’re not exactly what you would call “motivated”. Keeping that in mind, he checks in early Thursday, riding a two game winning streak, and looking to get bery nigh on the Eastern Conference tonight. Oh yeah, and he’s going to go after some played out pop culture items. Dog style, brah.

Big game 5 tonight at the Palace. Cavs come in on a roll after taking two at home and tying the series up and the Pistons look to hold serve at their house. I love the way they’re playing right now, and this series should really be 3-1 Cavs (Cleveland should have taken one of those first two). Plus, it appears that Lebron has really taken the criticism to heart and is actually doing something about it. Although it screams “let down” game, I’m taking King James and the points.

The Pick: CLE +5.5

Since the write-up was especially short today, I’d like to touch on a few things. Specifically, things/people I’m tired of at the moment:

Barry Bonds haters

Why is everyone so pissed that he won’t give his stuff to Cooperstown? Baseball has shit on him for the past 3 years and the Commissioner is debating whether or not to attend his record-breaking game or even whether or not to have a sanctioned celebration. And he’s supposed to happily turn over memorabilia worth hundreds of thousands of to a hall of fame that will ultimately end up vilifying him? Preebs. As much as I dislike Bonds supporters who try to turn the dislike into a race issue, I dislike over-zealous haters even more.

Nadia Yassir

I know 24 has been over for a while, and I know it was a very down season; but I also know that most people did watch the whole thing, and I just can’t let the turd that Nadia laid this season go unmentioned. Let’s see – she was about to let some evil doctor torture Audrey to death before Jack stepped in, she was constantly trying to reign Jack in until the very end, and she cowered in fear while Milo took a bullet for her from the Chinaman (is that the proper nomenclature?). And what does she get from all this? A nice pat on the back and a “thanks for saving the day.” What a cunt.

Tim Duncan’s “Resurgence”

There has been a huge surge in the media pointing out that Duncan has been “underrated” for so long and never gets any attention because he’s so boring, even though these same articles come out every time the Spurs go deep in the playoffs. However, it seems especially overblown this year. Yes, Duncan will go down as one of the greatest ever, but let’s not get carried away here. I absolutely believe the fact that Tim Duncan is cool as scabies will negatively affect the way people remember him. Honestly, who will you remember more in 10 years, Tim Duncan or Allen Iverson?

Entourage

I’m constantly amazed how a show with zero likeable OR funny characters – yes, even Ari’s act has worn thin – can be so popular. Do people just watch this show because they trot out 4-5 smokestacks per episode, or just because they’re too lazy to get off the couch after Sopranos? I was with it the first season, barely hung on last season, and jumped ship after 2 unbearable episodes this season. Have I missed anything? Let me guess – Turtle and Drama had a funny misadventure trying to get laid? Ari made a funny gay joke about his assistant? Sounds hilarious. When do Big Love and The Wire start?

Looks like old Fancypants may be heating back up just in time for the Finals. Let him know why the Cavs get blown out tonight or how much of a Norris he is in the comments section.

Instant Offense
(Ed. Note: Fancypants, our resident “handicapper” will be bringing you golden nuggets of gambling goodness on a semi-regularly scheduled basis)

I’m not sure what it is about the NBA playoffs that turns mediocre gamblers into handicapping gods, but there’s certainly something there. Every year, after a long and disappointing run in the NFL and college, full of what we like to call “Payout Tuesdays,” these magical two months come along and provide just enough of a boost to our confidence and savings account to keep us coming back for another year. I’d like to present a theory as to why going Vinnie Johnson during the playoffs is so common.

** SPOILER ALERT ** If you are not interested in de-pantsing your local bookie and paddling his bare ass on the NBA playoffs, please stop reading.

Honestly, I don’t follow the NBA nearly enough to feel confident betting games during the regular season. Running a fantasy team and giving a cursory glance to the standings is about all the time I’m willing to invest. However, when the playoffs come around, this doesn’t seem to matter. The only explanation that comes to mind is the combination of the lines being relatively low and the winner of any individual game being relatively easy to pick. With the lines in the playoffs usually hovering at 6 or 7 and below, if you can pick the correct winner of the game you’ve also got a pretty decent shot at covering as well. This is obvious if you take the underdog but is most applicable to small favorites. This is also why I don’t like taking a team unless I think they can win the game – it’s like you’re betting a window rather than just on a side.

With this in mind, a consortium of nickel-and-dimers here will be working together to provide picks throughout the rest of the playoffs. Keep in mind that these picks will not have any real analysis attached to them, only topical knowledge of what’s going on as the series progresses. It’s worked for years now and the 2007 playoffs are no different– why not keep it going?

Tonight: Pistons -6.5. We’ve been riding the Pistons throughout the playoffs – no reason to stop now. Let’s make LeBron and company come in and keep this game close. If he can, hats off, but I’m banking on the Cavs having a little of the “happy to be here” feeling during game one and the Pistons blowing them out just like the Pistons-Bulls Game 1.